Thinking too much is to overanalyze situations, decisions, mistakes, fears or possibilities. It is, in reality, getting stuck in the world of thoughts and forgetting that it is our feet, and not thoughts, that walk. We lose focus and our energy is diluted between insecurities, self-reproach or grudges. It paralyzes us, exhausts us and generates emotional discomfort.
There is nothing wrong with thinking about things. It is healthy, in fact, to reflect on what we live or do, become aware and take charge of what we really want. Overthinking is crossing the line. And the key is that those thoughts do not give you clarity, but more stress. That’s when it becomes a problem.
If at any point in your life you have thought too much, stay with me until the end of this article. I am going to share with you 7 tips to stop overthinking. Shall we start?
1. Identify that “too much”
The first step to be able to solve or deal with a problem is, normally, to recognize that you have that problem. And, more specifically, identify when we are letting ourselves be carried away by that problem, giving up the reins of our mind and feeling out of control.
Perhaps these keys will help you identify this issue:
- You are thinking about what to do at that moment, and yet ten minutes go by without you having decided.
- You have done something (eg: ask someone for a favor, set a personal limit) that you do not know what repercussions it will have and your mind hijacks you, so that for hours you do not allow yourself to fully enjoy other things.
- You experience physical and emotional tension, you start conflicts with people who have nothing to do with what occupies your mind.
2. Stop and breathe
We are thoughts, body and emotion. And with body we refer to actions and behaviors. Take charge of your body and stop for a moment. If you stay still, you will see the rest too. And nothing happens, the world does not end.
Calm your breathing and those emotions and thoughts will slow down too. You are the one who thinks, feels and acts. They are not your thoughts, in fact, you are not even your thoughts. You are so much more. Make yourself aware of it.
3. Use your senses
Especially hearing or touch. It is difficult to listen carefully to one’s thoughts if we are listening to relaxing music or touching, for example, the grass and listening to crickets singing around us.
Let yourself be enveloped, through your senses, by those small details that surround you. Small but real, tangible, present.
Choose for this music, sounds, visualizations or textures that adapt to your mood to gradually calm it down. For example, if you are sad, allow yourself to switch from relief to joy. If you are anxious, allow yourself to shift from agitated movement to calm.
4. Use the 10 second rule
Sometimes we eternalize decisions that are simple and whose repercussions cannot really be catastrophic. For example, what to have for a snack or who to propose to go out this afternoon. In those cases, the 10 second rule can help you.
- If you are deciding between two things to eat and are having a hard time, start counting to 10 and make a choice. Whichever.
- If you’re debating what to wear for tomorrow and you’re starting to get stressed, count to 10 and choose an outfit. Whichever.
Obviously, you don’t want to do this with major life decisions. But if you do it with all your minor decisions, you will save yourself a lot of time and you will be practicing decision making.
5. Calm your fears
One of the reasons many people worry too much about certain things is fear. We worry about so many possible catastrophic scenarios that we are practically paralyzed.
The cognitive-behavioral approach, which I often work on in my online practice, helps precisely to regain control over those catastrophic thoughts. Manage them to make them realistic, respectful, which is not the same as positive. Re-educating our thought patterns is sometimes necessary.
For example, if your biggest fear of going to a party or not going is fainting, thinking that it is unlikely and that, if it does happen, you will not be alone can help you. Consider seeking and receiving one-on-one professional help if you think this would do you good! I myself can accompany you in this learning process in my online consultation.
6. Let the good be good
In some cases, we may have perfectionist tendencies in our thought patterns. We analyze a lot to be able to do the tasks that we propose or propose to us 100% well.
Learn, then, to let good enough be good. You won’t always find the perfect solution for every problem or situation, and that’s okay. Flow, accept that giving your best does not mean that you should exceed yourself until you forget yourself.
Sometimes you just have to accept that the solution you found is the best you could find. Be okay with not everything going well. Be okay with things being okay for the most part, even if some minor bugs do happen.
When you choose to let good enough be good, you don’t worry as much about getting every little detail right. You just do your best and allow yourself to be good enough, without demanding perfection.
7. Let it out
When a situation or circumstance bothers us, makes us uncomfortable, embarrasses or scares us, it is difficult not to repeat it over and over again in our head. You may need to release it all somehow.
One way to do this is by speaking. Let the person involved, or a good friend, know how you have been feeling about what happened to you recently. Express the questions you have and that assail you. Finding answers and accepting them, even if they are not ideal, can help you reduce worry.
You can also write your reflections, or draw them! I myself often use an objective fact journal to understand myself and make self-care decisions. It frees my mind and anchors me to the present.
Whichever outlet you choose, taking the time to release those words that are circulating within you will help ease your emotions.